Understanding U

Robert Browne – Stop and think about what you are and who you are through the decisions that you make. 

Sam: One of the hardest things we can do is to look in the mirror and say, who are you? And then know the answer.  Today’s show is about personal growth.  Take a look at your business card or your job title, the role you play in your family, and the things others say about you and get ready to look beneath all that. 

Theme: The Curated Chapter

Sam: Knowing who you are is easy for some people but not everyone. It’ s a difficult question to answer. We spend our lives making decisions, building relationships, and pursuing goals, but we don’t always take the time to consider what those choices say about us.

Robert Browne believes that understanding ourselves is one of life’s most important journeys. He just wrote a book about it. It’s called Understanding U. The title is simple, but it carries a powerful message — before we can strengthen our relationships, grow as individuals, or live with greater purpose, we first need to understand who we are — this was his path. 

Robert – I wanted to find a place where I was at peace with what I felt about my decision to move on with my life. And at the time, I was seriously thinking about entering into another relationship, which could have ended into a marriage with a woman that, although was very attractive, I later came to discover was not the right person for me. My brother really helped me to realign my thinking with who and what I am right now, and to come to grips with myself as an individual, reset myself emotionally and mentally, and use my energies and my time in such a way so I can discover who I am through things that I would now do, such as getting out traveling. Connecting with other people, forming business partnerships in the fitness industry, nonprofit work. All of those things helped me to focus on giving instead of getting, and in the process, I really came to discover who I am as a person, a person who wants to enjoy giving back to those who gave to me through the community, through my affiliations, with my close friends, and with my business partners. They all helped me to understand better who I am as a person moving forward.

Sam: For Robert, self-discovery wasn’t simply an exercise in reflection. It changed the direction of his life. As he focused on giving back, building relationships, and contributing to his community, he found something many people spend a lifetime searching for: a deeper sense of purpose.

Robert – So once I started to really feel the joy that came from giving back and not focusing on the negative experience of having to lose out on the relationship or lose it, I gained something far better, a deeper sense of purpose and meaning with my life as an individual. And that’s what really inspired me to write the book.

Sam: Understanding U is built around the idea that the better we understand ourselves, the better equipped we are to grow as individuals and strengthen our relationships. 

Throughout the book, Robert invites readers to look beneath appearances and examine the thoughts, intentions, and values that guide their actions. Through short reflections on topics like grief, compassion, and assumptions he encourages readers to take a closer look at the person they are becoming.

Robert – The one thing I want them to take away is to understand who they are today. Stop and think about what you are and who you are through the decisions that you make. Whatever they are, however big or small they are, take the time to analyze who you are and make sure that your decisions are a true projection of the person that you are within, not based on what others perceive you to be.

Sam: In Understanding U, Robert uses everyday experiences to explore personal growth, kindness, compassion, and the choices we make every day. He believes the people we meet and the experiences we have can teach us a lot about ourselves. 

It’s a lesson he learned from his older brother George, who encouraged him to take the time to understand himself and make sure his decisions reflected who he truly was.

Robert – My oldest brother, George, who passed away, always had an expression. He used to always say growing up, oldest knows best. And when he used to say it, because we were all younger, to me, I’m like, okay, what is he talking about? He hasn’t been on earth that long. But as I’ve gotten older, and especially after he passed away in 2011, I started to see what he was talking about. And that statement was the impetus that drove me to write this book, because of what he told me about myself that helped me understand. Robert, get to really understand yourself. Make sure that anything you do is a reflection of who you really are as a person, not somebody else’s expression of you, not based on what others may perceive you to be or perceive you not to be. But make sure it’s really about who you understand yourself to be.

Sam: It may be the most important lesson in the entire book. Understanding who you are takes time. It requires reflection, patience, and a willingness to be honest with yourself. For Robert, those lessons became the foundation of Understanding U.

Robert: – Don’t rush the process. This book, in many respects, which really covers almost 20 years as a project, from 2006 until now that we’re having this interview, really suffices the point. So, I’m really happy I listened to him.

Sam: One story that especially resonated with Robert was the tale of Balto, the famous sled dog whose courage and determination helped save lives. 

Robert – He was ridiculed, he was persecuted, he was treated as an outcast because he was different. And Balto’s character really showed me the true joy that came from ignoring what people think about you or what they say about you and finding joy and satisfaction in who you are. And Balto, the movie character, he really inspired me to give because when the children in the movie were sick, he on his own accord went to save those children by getting some antitoxin medication and bringing it back to Nome, Alaska to save those children from diphtheria. So his selfless act, risking his own life and putting the responsibility on his shoulders to save a whole town, as well as the dogs who were racing with him because he had to lead them back, was really an outstanding example of courage. It really touched my heart and it’s a movie that I recommend that anybody see. It’s worth the watch.

Sam: I love that, and it wasn’t just the movie that inspired him, it was the statue. In New York’s Central Park there is a Bronze Statue of Balto that looks out over a walking path. It was done by Frederick George Richard Roth – a native of Brooklyn and here’s a fun fact that I found on Wikipedia — The Real Balto, the actual dog, was present at the unveiling ceremony back in 1925, making him the only Central Park statue subject to attend their own dedication. 

Robert says while he was inspired by Balto’s courage, self discovery is not easy. It requires you to have an open mind, to be honest with yourself when you look inward. Writing the book forced him to do exactly that.

Robert – I had so many thoughts that sometimes when you’re writing and you have all of these emotions inside you, you have to break your emotions up. You have to compartmentalize your emotions and break them down so that you can understand, OK, what’s the dominant emotion here? Is it love? Is it fear? Is it joy? Whatever is the dominant emotion. That’s what I wanted to leave. And what was the dominant emotion with me was love, love for my brother, for what he stood for, love for people. Love for myself, for who I am, coming to grips and coming to terms with who I am, and then joy followed that after the joy. Some fears, admittedly, because I wanted to make sure that I really moved people to act. I wanted to make sure that the book did exactly what I wanted to do because it moved me. But it’s another thing for it to move countless others when they lay eyes on or read the book. And that was my concern. So love, joy and fear were my three dominant emotions that govern my writings.

Sam: In the end, the journey that began with self-discovery led Robert to something even greater: peace with who he is.

The book is titled Understanding U. Just the letter U. And maybe that’s why the title works so well. At its heart, the book is about understanding ourselves, what we value, and how our choices shape the people we become.

Personal growth happens one decision at a time. One relationship at a time. One moment of reflection at a time. Robert’s invitation to all of us….

Robert Browne – Be yourself unapologetically, but respectfully.

Well said. 

I’m Sam Youmans, and this has been The Curated Chapter, from Webtalkradio. .Thank you for listening.