The Art of Manliness

What if there was one piece of fitness equipment that was affordable, didn’t take up much space, could get you both strong and flexible, and was fun to use?

While that might sound too good to be true, my guest, Pat Flynn, would say you can find all those benefits in the old-school kettlebell. Pat, who’s the author of Strong ON!: 101 Minimalist Kettlebell Workouts to Blast Fat, Build Muscle, and Boost Flexibility―in 20 Minutes or Less, calls kettlebells the Swiss Army knife  of workout tools and the minimalist’s ultimate secret fitness weapon.

Today on the show, we unpack why Pat’s such an advocate for bells, but before we get there, we first take a dive into his background in philosophy and why beginning a workout program takes faith. We then talk about how to use kettlebells to get an all-around fit physique, including the three kettlebell weights that make for an ideal starter set, the two best exercises for building muscle, the pyramid-shaped program that can facilitate body recomposition, how to incorporate progressive overload into kettlebell training, which kettlebell exercise Coach Dan John considers “the fat-burning athlete builder,” the “300 Swings Challenge” that will help you take a Bruce Lee approach to fitness, and much more.

AoM Article: Become Strong Like Bull — The Kettlebell WorkoutAoM Article: How to Perform 4 Kettlebell Exercises — An Illustrated GuideAoM Podcast #295 — Kettlebells and the Psychology of TrainingAoM Article: Strength, Power, Conditioning — How to Master the Kettlebell Swing

Strong ON! websiteKettlebell Quickies YouTube ChannelPat on IG

The Roman caesars were the rulers of the Roman Empire, beginning in 27 BC with Julius Caesar’s heir Augustus, from whom subsequent caesars took their name, and lasting until around the fall of the Western Empire in 476 AD. The caesars transitioned the Roman Republic to autocratic rule, consolidating vast territories under centralized authority and shaping Western governance, law, and culture. Their reign marked one of history's most influential periods, laying the groundwork for modern empires and enduring legacies in political and architectural innovation.

They also left behind some instructive leadership lessons, in both what and what not to do.

Here to unpack some of the Roman Empire's most significant caesars as both histories and leadership case studies is Barry Strauss, who is a classicist, professor, military historian, fellow at Stanford's Hoover Institution, and the author of numerous books, including Ten Caesars. Today on the show, Barry shares how Augustus consolidated power by initially cleaning house, a redeeming quality of the otherwise infamous Nero, the strategies Vespasian and Severus used to gain legitimacy as outsiders, why Marcus Aurelius was an insightful philosopher but struggled as an emperor, the emperor under whose rule the empire began its decline, what Constantine understood about the idea that if you want things to stay the same, everything must change, and much more.

Barry's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #487 — Leadership Lessons From the 3 Greatest Ancient CommandersBarry's forthcoming book: Jews vs. Rome — Two Centuries of Rebellion Against the World's Mightiest EmpireAoM Podcast #346: The Fall of the Roman RepublicAoM Podcast #969: The Making of a Stoic Emperor

Barry's websiteBarry's faculty pageBarry on LinkedIn

When people think about winter, they often focus on the negatives: the cold, the dark, and the seasonal depression the season can bring. But my guest today questions whether winter really has to be so miserable and says that by changing our mindset, we can actually learn to enjoy and even thrive during this season.

Kari Leibowitz is a psychologist and the author of How to Winter: Harness Your Mindset to Thrive on Cold, Dark, or Difficult Days. She spent a year at the northernmost university in the world in Tromsø, Norway, studying why people living in the Arctic, where the sun doesn't rise for two months, don't suffer from seasonal depression at the rates you might expect. Today on the show, Kari explains how our expectations can create a nocebo effect that makes winter feel worse than it needs to, why breaking winter into three distinct sub-seasons can help us appreciate it more, how Nordic practices like hygge can make darkness feel cozy rather than oppressive, and why getting outside and staying social — even when it's cold and dark — are keys to thriving during the season.

AoM Podcast #856: Befriending WinterAoM Article: 8 Things That Can Help You Get More Hygge This WinterAoM Podcast #566: How to Have a Hyggely Christmas and a More Memorable New YearAoM Article: How Saunas Can Help Save Your Body, Mind, and SpiritAoM Podcast #801: The Cold Water Swim CureSunday Firesides: Contentment Through ContrastSunday Firesides: No Such Thing as Bad Weather

Kari's websiteKari on XKari's Substack — Wintry Mix

Feeling overwhelmed by an endless to-do list? Like you're constantly putting out fires but never getting ahead? You're not alone. Many people today feel like they're drowning in urgency — filling every minute with tasks that feel critical in the moment but may not truly matter in the long run.

Here to help us understand how to escape this cycle is Matt Reynolds, a strength coach, business owner, and the author of Undoing Urgency: How to Focus on What Matters Most. Today on the show, Matt explains what creates that feeling of being overwhelmed by urgency, how to distinguish between status and true value, and why you can only effectively pursue 2-3 major goals at once. We discuss using the Eisenhower Decision Matrix to identify what tasks truly matter, how to apply the concept of "minimum effective dose" beyond just fitness, and why sometimes the pursuit of a goal matters more than achieving it. We end our conversation with concrete steps you can take today to start undoing urgency in your life.

Matt's previous appearances on the AoM podcast:
Episode #826: From Novice to Advanced — The Weightlifter’s JourneyEpisode #302: My Workout Routine & The Benefits of a Strength CoachEpisode #154: Strength Training for Everyone
AoM Article: The Eisenhower Decision Matrix — How to Distinguish Between Urgent and Important Tasks and Make Real Progress in Your LifeAoM Article: Motivation Over Discipline 

Matt's websiteBarbell LogicTurnKey Coach

Sports gambling has exploded in America. You can't watch a game today without being bombarded by ads from betting companies, often co-branded with the major sports leagues themselves. It's a dramatic shift from just seven years ago, when these same leagues were unified in their opposition to legalized sports betting.

Michael Lewis, the bestselling author of Moneyball, The Big Short, and The Blind Side, has been exploring this transformation in the latest season of his podcast Against the Rules. Today on the show, Michael explains how we went from prohibition to proliferation, unpacking how a 2018 Supreme Court decision opened the floodgates for an industry that's now seeing over $100 billion in annual bets. We discuss how betting companies use data and psychology to nudge people into making increasingly complex and unfavorable wagers, why young men are particularly susceptible to gambling addiction, and what the rise of "prop bets" means for the integrity of sports. We also get into the concerning public health implications of widespread sports betting and what past addictive epidemics might tell us about where this is all heading.

Against the Rules podcastMichael's website Michael on FB

The Industrial Revolution changed the nature of work, so that many people labored in factories, continuously performing the same task, at the same pace, for the duration of their shift.

Two centuries on, even though most folks have moved from working with their hands to working with their heads and from manufacturing set outputs to solving complex problems, generating creative ideas, and processing information, we still tend to work as if we're manning an assembly line.

My guest says that being stuck in this factory framework is to our detriment, and that there's a much better way to do knowledge work, one that's less like manning an assembly line and more like driving a car.

Mithu Storoni is a Cambridge-trained physician, a neuroscience researcher, and the author of Hyperefficient: Optimize Your Brain to Transform the Way You Work. Today on the show, Mithu offers a modern approach to achieving peak performance and explains why it's better to impose the natural rhythms of our brains on our work than to impose the rhythms of our work on our brains. She shares why you should treat your brain like an engine with three different gears, how people have different "gear personalities," and how to use environmental cues, specially structured 90-minutes cycles of work, and even caffeine to shift your brain into the optimal gear for different mental challenges.

Mithu's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Podcast #525: How to Stress Proof Your Body and BrainAoM Podcast #743: How to Get Time, Priorities, and Energy Working in Your Favor

Mithu's websiteMithu on XMithu on IGMithu on LinkedIn

In an age where a lot of formalized decorum has vanished, the holidays are still a time with rules, traditions, and unspoken expectations. It's also a time of heightened social interactions and increased opportunities to demonstrate warmth, hospitality, and all-around gentlemanly politeness.  

Here to help us navigate the many scenarios for practicing good etiquette that the holidays present is Thomas Farley, aka Mr. Manners. Today on the show, Thomas shares the neglected aspects of flying etiquette, how to be a non-annoying houseguest, the paradoxes of party arrival punctuality, whether a dinner party host should accommodate the special dietary restrictions of guests, how to get lingering guests out of your home after a party, how to best navigate an office holiday party, the rules of regifting, guidelines for holiday tipping, and much more.

Thomas' previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #897 — Answers to the FAQ of Modern EtiquetteAoM Article: How to be the Perfect HouseguestAoM Article: How to Be a Gracious HostAoM Article: How to Be the Ultimate Party HostAoM Article: A Gentleman Never Arrives Empty-HandedEsquire's Handbook for Hosts: A Time-Honored Guide to the Perfect PartyThomas' TEDx talk on tipping cultureSinbad's bit about people ordering at McDonald's

Thomas' websiteThomas on IGThomas on X

Many people think becoming wealthy is all about having the right job, inheritance, or just lucky breaks. And those things can certainly give you a leg up. But according to my guest, the biggest key to building wealth is your mindset, as research shows that even high earners can stay broke forever if they’re trapped in poor thinking patterns, while others can build lasting wealth on modest incomes by developing the right mental approach.

Dr. Brad Klontz is a financial psychologist, wealth manager, and professor, and the co-author of Start Thinking Rich: 21 Harsh Truths to Take You from Broke to Financial Freedom. Today on the show, Brad explains the critical difference between being broke and being poor, how learned helplessness keeps people financially stuck, and practical ways to develop an agentic, wealth-building mindset. We also tackle thorny issues like the role of homeownership in building wealth and how to handle relationships that might be holding back your financial future.

Brad‘s previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #529 — The Money Scripts That Are Holding Back Your Financial FutureAoM Podcast #321: How to Think About MoneyAoM Podcast #536: How to Achieve a “Rich Life” With Your FinancesAoM Article: Taking Control of Your LifeAoM Article: Avoiding Learned HelplessnessAoM Article: A Young Man’s Guide to Understanding Retirement Accounts — IRAsCompound Interest Calculator 

Start Thinking Rich website Brad‘s website

Endurance activities, like distance running, have existed since ancient times. But humans' relationship to those pursuits has changed, according to time and place. In the West, we've currently turned endurance sports into a science — tracking every metric and chasing personal records through sophisticated technology and personalized training plans. But as my guest, who's spent years studying the running cultures in different societies, knows well, this modern, individualized, data-driven approach isn't the only way to pursue the art of endurance.

Michael Crawley is a competitive runner, social anthropologist, and the author of To the Limit. On the show today, we first examine how Western athletes have "workified" running through technology and social media. We then look at how other cultures approach running differently, including why East African runners emphasize group training over individual goals and how the Rarámuri people of Mexico incorporate spiritual dimensions into their running. We end our conversation with how we might rediscover more meaningful, holistic ways to approach our own physical pastimes.

AoM Podcast #1,021: You Were Born to RunBorn to Run by Christopher McDougall

Michael on XMichael on IGMichael's faculty page

These days, you hear more and more about parents and adult children being estranged from each other. Some individuals have even decided to go "no contact" with their parents; they don't want anything to do with their mom and/or dad at all.

To understand what's behind this phenomenon, today I talk to Joshua Coleman, a psychologist who's spent 40 years counseling families and the author of Rules of Estrangement: Why Adult Children Cut Ties and How to Heal the Conflict. Joshua
goes beyond the typical one-sided narratives around parent-child estrangement that tell the story of parents who got what they deserved or overly entitled adult children who wrongly blame their parents, to unpack the larger cultural context for why these tensions have arisen. We discuss how society has moved from upholding a honor-thy-father-and-mother sense of obligation to prioritizing individuality and optionality, and why despite the fact that we're more child-focused and psychologically aware than ever, familial estrangements are on the rise. We get into the common reasons for estrangement, the role that expanding ideas of what constitutes abuse and trauma and an adult child's therapist can play in it, and how much parents can really be blamed for how their kids turn out. And we get into what parents who are estranged from their children can do to reconcile with them. Even if you're not personally estranged from a family member, the discussion of the underlying dynamics influencing all our modern relationships is a fascinating one.

AoM Podcast #788: The Dangers of “Concept Creep”AoM Podcast #873: The Myths of Trauma

Joshua's website