# 45 - “Just Push Through”: The Hidden Cost of Teaching Autistic & AuDHD People to Override Themselves

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In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, Dr. Allison Sucamele explores the hidden cost of one of the most common pieces of advice autistic and AuDHD people hear: "Just push through." Drawing on current research and lived experience, she examines the critical differences between discomfort and overload, resilience and self-abandonment, executive dysfunction and reluctance, and growth versus chronic depletion. This episode challenges the belief that perseverance always leads to healing and instead asks a more important question: What did pushing through actually cost? If you've ever wondered why "coping" eventually stopped working, this conversation offers both validation and a new way to understand your nervous system.

Resources

Autistic Burnout
Raymaker, D. M., et al. Research on autistic burnout, including chronic exhaustion, loss of skills, reduced tolerance to sensory and cognitive demands, and the impact of prolonged life stress.

Social Camouflaging
Hull, L., et al. Research on social camouflaging (masking) in autistic adults and the development of the Camouflaging Autistic Traits Questionnaire (CAT-Q).

Double Empathy Problem
Milton, D. E. M. Research and theoretical work describing the reciprocal misunderstandings that can occur between autistic and non-autistic people.

Monotropism
Murray, D., Lesser, M., & Lawson, W. Research exploring autistic attention through the framework of monotropism.

Sensory Processing
Research examining sensory hyperreactivity, hyporeactivity, sensory seeking, and the impact of sensory environments on autistic well-being.

Interoception
Research exploring differences in noticing, interpreting, and responding to internal bodily signals in autistic individuals.

ADHD & Executive Functioning
Research on executive functioning, including task initiation, working memory, inhibition, reward processing, time perception, and context-dependent performance.

Crisis Support

If you are experiencing a mental health crisis:

• United States & Canada: Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.
• United States: Text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line.

If you are outside the United States or Canada, please contact your country's local emergency services or crisis hotline.