Shadow Work Coach: Overfunctioning, Losing the Spark & What to Do About It

Have you ever lost the spark with your partner (or even just in life?) and wondered if it’s possible to get it back?  Have you felt frustrated or resentful with a partner who doesn't seem to grow with you? or listen to your needs?

In this episode, I’m joined by Cinda, a shadow work coach and Aaruka therapist, for an honest conversation about relationships, attraction and the patterns we carry from childhood into love.

We talk about why your relationship is often your biggest mirror, how fear of abandonment can show up even if you were never physically abandoned, and why so many capable, overfunctioning women end up attracted to partners who need fixing. I also open up about my own relationship history, the belief I carried that my worth was in how I looked, and why a safe, stable partner felt so uncomfortable at first.

Cinda also answers questions sent in by a friend going through a separation, including how to tell genuine attraction from an old wound, and if attraction can return in a long-term relationship.

In this episode, we cover:

How to get the spark back in a long-term relationshipWhy your relationship is a mirror of unhealed patternsChildhood wounds, fear of abandonment and attachment in relationshipsWhy safe love can feel uncomfortable, and how self-sabotage shows upOverfunctioning, the mental load and why control often comes from anxietyHow to communicate your needs clearly to your partnerWhy understanding a partner’s trauma doesn’t mean excusing their behaviourEmotional availability, and why we attract what we areChemistry versus familiarity when dating after divorce or separationWhat to do when you’re growing and your partner seems to be standing still

Follow Kylie HERE

Follow Cinda HERE

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