#134: Beneath the False Self: Soul Therapy and the Search for Your True Self with Joanne Zagnoev

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Soul Therapy with Joanne Zagonev: Healing the False Self Through Psychology & Tanya

In this episode of From The Inside Out Podcast, with Rivkah and Eda, we introduce clinical psychologist and author Joanne Zagenov, whose book "Soul Therapy" integrates psychodynamic/attachment theory with Tanya. Joanne shares how growing up in a culture that prized intelligence, feeling like an outsider, and early experiences of “not good enough” shaped her pursuit of psychology and later Chassidus through Rabbi YY Keselman, leading to deeper healing. The conversation explores the true self vs false self, healthy authenticity vs narcissistic “do what feels good,” secure attachment and defenses, and the Tanya’s animal soul and godly soul, emphasizing a God-directed life alongside responsible therapy. Joanne discusses sensitivity, anxiety as a coping mechanism, splitting and transference, practical Chassidic tools for low self-esteem, shame, envy, anger, and anxiety, and offers guidance on estranged family relationships.

EPISODE SPONSORS

Swimply

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Colel Chabad 

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Their Pushka (Charity Box) App makes it easy to turn inspiration into action with simple daily giving—small “micro-donations” that add up to real impact over time. To join thousands of daily givers, download the Pushka App on iOS or Android and start giving today: https://pushkapp.cc/Inside 

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Shefa Living & Yeshiva of Glade Valley:

Shefa Living is a warm, growing Jewish community nestled in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina — offering families the rare combination of natural beauty, affordable living, and authentic Torah life, all in one place. At the heart of the community is Yeshiva of Glade Valley, a school built on the understanding that every child is created with a unique soul, unique strengths, and unique needs. With small classrooms, close rebbe and morah relationships, strong Torah values, and a deep focus on emotional balance, confidence, and creativity, it's a place where children can truly feel seen — and where families can breathe a little deeper. Learn more here: https://yeshivagv.com/

OkClarity.Com

Finding the right therapist or coach can be one of the most challenging parts of seeking help — even with a great referral, the person isn't always the right fit. That's where OkClarity comes in. OkClarity is an online platform featuring hundreds of Jewish therapists, psychiatrists, coaches, nutritionists, and support groups, where you actually get to meet the person through videos and introductions before deciding whether to move forward with a first session. More than 10,000 people have already benefited from OkClarity, and it's not just a directory for those seeking help — if you're a mental health practitioner, therapist, or coach, you can list yourself on the platform too, so the people who need you can find you. Visit OKclarity.com: https://go.jcn.io/OtfUxl  to find the right fit for you.

GUEST BIO

Joanne Zagonev

Joanne Zagnoev is a clinical psychologist based in South Africa with over 32 years of experience helping clients navigate emotional healing, attachment wounds, and the search for authentic selfhood. She specializes in perinatal mood and anxiety disorders and is known for her unique integration of psychodynamic and attachment theory with the teachings of Tanya and Chassidus. Joanne is the author of Soul Therapy: Achieving Total Transformation Through Psychology and Tanya, in which she explores the parallel journeys of psychological healing and spiritual growth — distinguishing the true self from the false self, and the animal soul from the godly soul, on the path to living a God-directed life. A South African native and mother of four, Joanne brings both clinical expertise and personal insight to her work, helping clients move from woundedness to wholeness. 

You can purchase Joanne’s book, Soul Therapy, here: https://amzn.to/4eZCAGp 

COMMUNITY

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CHAPTERS

00:00 Introduction

02:58 Welcome And Background

04:24 Childhood Wounds

09:24 Psychology Meets Tanya

13:10 Triggers And Growth

15:24 True Self False Self

19:29 Authenticity And Empathy

25:56 Self Care Balance

28:38 Two Souls Explained

34:44 Therapy And Chassidus

38:01 Nature Nurture Sensitivity

39:58 Gaslighting Defined

52:56 Anxiety As Coping

57:00 Splitting Cupboard Analogy

59:53 Ambivalence and Splitting

01:01:01 Idealization in Therapy

01:03:24 Steel Cupboard Metaphor

01:06:38 Splitting Self and Narcissism

01:08:47 Transference and Distortion

01:13:45 People Pleasing False Self

01:15:33 Spiritual Tools Low Self Esteem

01:20:13 Anxiety Mantra and Caution

01:22:39 Envy and Bespoke Souls

01:30:34 Healing Shame vs Guilt

01:40:58 Anger and Seeing Godly Essence

01:49:34 Estrangement and Boundaries

01:54:45 Core Teachings and Farewell

COMMUNITY
Join the Community! Connect with us on socials to discuss Episode 101, share insights, and continue the conversations you want to have:

💫 Instagram https://www.instagram.com/fromtheinsideout.podcast/ 💫 Whatsapp: https://chat.whatsapp.com/L0W4PRglR5B4kC 💫 YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@FromTheInsideOutPodcast?sub_confirmation=1