Why Your Messages Sound Colder Than You Mean Them To
Best of Motivation | Clarity Over Noise
Think about the last message you sent before you left the house this morning. Was it short? Was it long? Somebody read it in a way you did not intend, and you will probably never hear about it.
In this episode Jessica and Brian take apart why perfectly polite messages land as cold, why “add a friendly opener” makes it worse for half your readers, and the three settings every message carries whether you meant them or not: length, warmth, speed.
You will hear two stories from the same team, a two-line Friday update and a four-hundred-word Monday email, and why nobody in either one was wrong. Jessica owns up to being a two-line replier. And there is one thing to try on the very next message you send.
In this episode
0:00 Three polite lines, read as annoyed
0:27 The three dials: length, warmth, speed
3:31 Two stories from one team
6:09 Which dial is yours?
Start here
There is one dial you push harder than you realise, and one you misread in other people over and over. You have watched everyone on your team for months. You are the one person you have never observed from the outside.
Take the free Colour Personality Quiz. Twelve questions, three minutes. It names your colour. Start there.
Related reading
• How to communicate with each personality colour
• What the personality colours actually mean
• Personality colours at work
Support the show
If this episode helped you think more clearly, try the free Colour Personality Quiz at bestofmotivation.com/personality-color-quiz — it takes 2 minutes and shows you how you lead, decide, and communicate.